Wednesday, April 25, 2012

A Pause, A Brave Journey, and a Blessing named Luke

So I havent been writing for a while and I have a very good reason. His name is Luke. He was born April 17, 2012 and weighed 8 pounds 12 ounces of delicious baby love and despite being told I could not, I DID birth him naturally. Let me start from the begining. Ive always wanted to have children, the ammount has gone up and down over the years, considerably down since I had my son, and after we had our daughter we decided a year and a half later we would like to try for another.  Now mind, we never do anything to stop pregnancies. Yes, I said it. I know many would gasp and say "Ellieliz! How irresponsible of you!" But this was a decision that we came to a few years after Talon was born. We wondered to ourselves, how come we let others rule our lives with some things, and leave other things up to God? Shoudnt we be leaving EVERYTHING up to God? We can trust in God to see that we always have food and shelter, yet we cant trust THAT taboo subject up to God too. So we did. A few months after our little sprite girl turned a year old we got pregnant with baby number three. We got some congratulations from our friends who do follow Gods lead in allt hings and understood how we view children....and then their were those poeple who flat out told us, I am not happy for you, you shoudnt even have the kids you have now. YES!! This was said to us. Ofcourse some thought I should have waited longer, there is also those who think I should have six years between each kid, why? no clue. If you ask me, none of these people should say anything but a big fat congrats and leave it at that, becuase unless you are here, taking care of my kids, paying our bills, and putting food in their mouths and clothes on their backs I dont think how many or when is really up to you.  Now the next obstacle. I had two prior cesarean births, NOT BY CHOICE! I was robbed from having two natural births by doctors and hospitals that simply set me up to FAIL. Now THEY failed me, I did not fail my children. I did my part. I gave up my favorite caffienated drinks, I cut back WAY cut back on my sugar in take, I excersized, destressed in natural ways and allowed my body to go into labor on its own....the end results were of not knowing my rights. I came into this birth knowing my rights, knowing the dangers of having another cesarean birth or natural birth, I weighed the pros and cons of each and found that it was actually more safe for me to attempt a vbac again, then it was for me to walk in there and schedule another cesarean. The risks of a repeat csection were higher for me and my unborn child. And like with my last two children, I will take one for the team, and go through the pain and whatever i have to, so that my child will recieve the healthiest and saftest entrance into this world. I found the best midwife in the community, who after catching babys for 35 years has seen alot of succesful hbacs, and I found a set of doctors who up till my 39th week of pregnancy was on board with my vbac attempt. I hired a doula who was passionate about what i was doing as I was, and with my husband, and my friends as support, I had a great birth team and plan. I continued to educate myself through the journey, and even though I had to see a specialist weekly for extra fluid this specialist convinced me there was no reason not to go ahead with my plan, the worse thing that would happen with my extra fluid was that the water would make a mess. And a mess it did! After 41 weeks of naysayers and educating others and calming OTHERS fears, I finally gave birth to my little luke at home, on a quiet tuesday morning, with my birth team around me. I did what alot said I could never do, I birthed a big baby, with my inadaquet pelvis. HAH! Ofcourse I still get the "i was so scared for you, but glad it went well" statements, even from someone who smokes cigerrates throughout her pregnancys...which i would think is more dangerous then taking on natural birth, but I know these people dont mean harm. I just hope that my journey could educate them...The cesarean machine in the hospital these days are not becuase women need more cesareans due to small pelvis and big babies or whatever else they put in mammas heads these days, but out of convenience for the doctors, and in vbacs case, a liability for the hospital, end of story. Now there are some cases where cesarean IS neccesary and I am very greatful for those instances that they are needed. I simply just wish that more doctors would give BIRTH A CHANCE and leave their game of put put for another day. I probably wont be writing much after this post, With three littles now Im even more outnumbered but dont take that as a gripe, I LOVE IT. I love being surrounded by these children, I love how different each and every one of them are, their hearts are good, I have some good poeple here, and why not....maybe I will have another one day. But Im not thinking so much about that now...I just had a baby, and as I kiss his head and his cheeks and his hands and well you get so very blessed that he is here. <3      have a good one guys! until next time...happy homesteading <3 01 02 18