And you know, Im a happy mamma for another reason to. I have learned alot about myself as a mother in these past few months, as well as grown alot stronger as a mom too. You ever hear the saying "It takes a village to raise a child" ? Well maybe that is true for some, but as Ive realised, not for me. When I was put on bedrest a few months ago, the bad kind of bedrest where your not allowed to get up (not like I could becusae of the pain being so bad) I thought Id have some help from some friends. But it turned out, they all were busy. So I was stuck doing it on my own. Besides my out of state and out of country friends sending me wonderful and thoughtful care packages filled with toys and things to keep the children entertained, and a wonderful book for me to read about learning to handle things with Grace (much needed to learn, thank you!) I was on my own. I could do this! And you know what? I did. I managed the unimanagable. I took care of my kids all by myself without any help whatsoever without even getting up from the couch! And I managed to do it without neglecting my kids. As I was slowly able to get up and do more I realised (again) just how cool and awesome my kids are. They worked together to help me, my two year old as sweet as can be, smothered me with kisses and offered to help me everytime i got up to cook. My six year old was more then delighted to help his little sis on the potty, wash her hands, get a toy she cant reach, get something for me, even take the stinky diapers to put in the wet bag or clean up accidents from a potty trainer. As I sulked and felt bad for a while because after some things had been said, I was feeling bad for even needing help, I realised, that I didnt need help in the first darned place. So though nobody ever really tells me much outside my little group of girlfriends and my husband that I am a good mom...and my kids telling me all the time. I really know it and believe it. And with that, to me is as fresh and new a feeling as the spring that will surely come soon. I am a good mom. And even when I do need some help, becuase lets face it, everyone DOES need help sometimes and that does not mean you shoudnt have more kids, or shoudnt have HAD kids, Im still not a bad mom. And to all my girls that have been such an ongoing encouragment to me, I thank you and I love you from the bottem of my heart. 01 02 03
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